In January I received a phone call from my mom. She told me that she was praying that all of her married children would get pregnant in 2009. Well it was cold in January and everyone ended up with baby fever. I don't know if it was my mom's prayer or if everyone thought it would be fun to be pregnant together but soon my sister J announced she was expecting, then my brother M announced, they just had twin girls. In February my bother L's wife had a baby boy. A few months later my sister T announced they were due in January.
This just left my brother D and his wife, and C n' I. The pressure was on and man there were a lot of tears on my end. I'm sure on D's side as well. We both have been trying for so long, it just didn't seem fair that the others tried for a month and it didn't take any effort at all on their part. I know the Lord sends each of us different challenges but that is exactly what this is, a challenge.
The year is now ending and I have 3 new nephews, my sister B now has a step/son, and 2 new nieces. Last night I received a great phone call. My brother D just announced they are expecting in May. So my mom still has 2 grand babies yet to be born.
I'm excited for everyone to be pregnant and having babies. However it is also really hard. I want a baby so bad it hurts. I can usually bury those feelings for long amounts of time. However the feelings are getting harder and harder to bury and it's hard not to feel a little jipped. I'm tired of crying and Buckie isn't cuttin' it anymore.
2 comments:
I love you Sarah and my heart aches with you. sending lots of ((((HUGS)))) your way.
Thanks for opening your heart to us and sharing your feelings of frustration. On a day when I'm ready to give one away (you can have Quade right now!!!) it helps bring me back in proper perspective. Don't lose hope-the year isn't over yet!
Love ya. ~Sasha
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